Methods for building character & integrity

Here’s an excellent article I just had to scoop up, copy & paste here, for all my dear readers because it really is a keeper from Steve-Olson.com.  I encourage you to check out his blog for very insightful and inspiring thoughts on living a life of virtue.

From Steve-Olson.com’s blog:  6 Methods for Building Exceptional Character and Integrity

“So how can one develop exceptional character and integrity? What produces these traits? I believe it must be hard for a professional athlete, an American Idol winner, or an A-List Blogger to maintain character and integrity in the face of wealth, ego, fame, and obsequious praise. To retain the power that comes with such a position requires a clear understanding of personal responsibility. We consistently see hubris take down athletes, rock stars, writers, and actors. But what can we learn from the folks in the spotlight who avoid the trap of arrogance and ego?

· Become other person centric – The path to exceptional and remarkable character is found by creating value for other people. Remember, Wayne Gretzky assisted his teammates twice as much as he himself scored (1963 Assists vs. 894 Goals), and still smashed every individual scoring record in history. If you focus on other people, on their needs and what makes them special, you will find yourself naturally acting with character and integrity because your selfishness will fade. How can you be selfish when you see so much greatness in others? How can you fail once you open your eyes to the sea of talent and unique abilities which surrounds you? Many people talk of character traits such as honesty, fairness, compassion, generosity, and courage. These traits become natural and effortless when you become other person centric.

· Contribute first – Never start by focusing on what you can get; focus on what you can give. Winners give 100%; they don’t get 100%. Never say, “I’m not going to help until I know what is in it for me.” Instead say, “give it everything, this is what I want to do, and the results will take care of themselves. “ Your positive actions produce the fruits of existence. Contribute first and the rewards will take care of themselves.

· Develop mental toughness – Build defenses in your mind against negative influences. Quit watching the news. Quit listening to fear mongers. Quit listening to the voice in your head that says you can’t succeed. Kill the idea that some obstacles are too large to overcome. Smash the idea that success is pure luck and you aren’t one of the lucky ones. I know this is easier said than done. But you can begin to shutdown the negative voices in your life and replace them with positive voices. You can start right now. If you hang out with a habitually negative influence, find a new friend. I mean it. There is no point in consistently being fed negative thoughts and images. You can’t change other people; you can only change yourself. And if enough of us change ourselves, we will change the world. When you can’t avoid the negative voice, learn to actively counter negative words and images by consciously forcing positive replacements into your mind. If you do this frequently enough over time, you will develop a habit of mentally replacing negatives with positives, and this habit is the essence of mental toughness. Mental toughness is the ability to maintain positive focus, action, and thought in the midst of all appearances to the contrary.

· Encourage everyone around you to be the best they can be – Try to surround yourself with people who want to be the best they can be. But not everyone is trying to be the best they can be, so what can you do? The next best thing… encourage everyone around you to be the best they can be. Don’t do it directly. Do it through positive reinforcement. When you see someone begin to move in a positive direction, encourage them, tell them you think they’ve made a great decision, the kind of bold move that is right for them. When they succeed, tell them you knew they could do it. When they experience a setback, remind them it is only temporary and that things will work out if they learn from the setback, make changes, and persist. One setback does not rule a lifetime. Help them up, push them forward, if they don’t know where to go, lead the way and let them follow until they are ready to lead. Before you know it, everyone around you will be pushing themselves to be their best.

· Praise effort, progress, and success – Never use fear, anger, or shame to motivate. Use constructive criticism, but use it sparingly and only after maintaining considerable patience. Never give false praise or phony complements, people will see right through your lack of authenticity. But when you see strenuous effort, real progress, and outstanding achievement, notice it, recognize it, and celebrate it.

· Do the right thing even when it is unpopular – Doing this as a young person may be one of the most difficult things you will ever do. Many of us have failed this test. But that doesn’t mean you have to. When the group is bulling someone, defend the victim. Your heart knows what is right; listen to it and follow it. Listen to your conscience and it will give you the right answer in every difficult situation. You’ll know when this situation appears, your heart will pull you one way and the herd will pull you in another, follow your heart, the herd is headed off a cliff.

Character and Integrity belong to all of us. They aren’t simply traits for other people; they are traits worthy of you and me. The future is yours and it begins right now. The secret to change is within you. Change yourself and change the world.

Photo credit: Cartwheel by Jodi Tripp

It’s time to teach “ethics” in schools…again

Some 30-40 years ago, a certain Cabal of Intellectuals decided to prohibit teachers from teaching “ethics” to their students. You know, the personal qualities that set one above what some refer to as the common herd. A sea of renegades you can see so evident in Today’s world. By the term “herd” I think they mean those who are unethical, dishonest, refuse to be civil and lack character. Sadly, we need not search far and wide for examples of uncivil/unethical behavior. We need only to look at our present “professional representatives,” our own Congress, rift in unethical behavior. It’s terrible that we can’t even trust our elected officials to come down on the side of “ethical, professional representation” deserving of the public trust. Not so long ago, in the not-so-distant-past, we as a People could count on our professional sect – white collar workers and elected officials – to hold themselves to a higher standard than the average citizen. They are role models, after all. This aforementioned Cabal of Intellectuals, be it academic, military or governmental, seemed bent on socially engineering a population of unruly renegades worthy of containment, worthy of imprisonment, internment or martial law in order to facilitate seizing complete control over us plus our precious land and resources. Fleece us, if you will. And sadly, we need not look for some future catastrophic event to put this dastardly scenario into effect.  We are this scenario – now.

Think about it. What would you imagine need be done to bring about complete control of a population? What need be done aside from taking away from the People their jobs, their homes, any semblance of a secure future?

That select Cabal of Intellectuals had a plan, a set of strategies to take down the intellect, reasoning powers and critical thinking faculties of the People, a dumbing-down principle, in affect, so People would be easier to control, corral in, manipulate and exploit for their own purposes.

So what can we do? you might be thinking in disgust. I offer this – educate yourself. Find out what you’re an heir to – left to you by those who fought so hard for your freedom and your right to be left alone. Familiarize yourself with self-empowering documents – like our Declaration of Independence, the Constitution and our Bill of Rights. Then, educate others.

Insist, as parents, that schools teach our children how to be good, upstanding, ethical citizens with knowledge and information to ensure they become pillars of our communities; able to guide others into “good practices” applied to every good endeavor.

We need to lift our children up to their full potential. We need to imbue them with high standards of personal conduct, truthfulness, honesty, and the rewards that come from public service, fair & equal treatment for Everyone, and reverence for every living creature.

How else can we stem the onslaught of indifference, complacency, cruel & unusual behavior that is evident every where we look? The antisocial & psychotic behavior in our “professional” ranks – like doctors and health care workers who molest and rape their patients? Or, high-level managers who steal and lie their way into personal riches? The despicable behavior of our governing bodies?

We hold the future in our hands – now! We are the future! We are the oil that greases the upcoming Machine which is our children who will be the next governing body. They will decide what “we” are to “them,” what means of employment will be available to us, what services they will provide to the needy & poor, what laws will be enforced and how we will be punished for breaking them. Our children will be responsible for our future care as senior citizens. With these things in mind, you can see why it’s imperative that we raise up compassionate, decent, upright, honest and ethical children – they are our greatest and most important resource!

Why develop “character”?

Character draws admiration to us like a magnet. It’s because there’s not enough of it in the world and those who have it look like brilliant balls of light. Much like why there is death: it makes life more precious. A beneficial but scarce commodity is always prized. Something of value, like personal character, is well sought out, and snapped up quickly. Imagine everyone thinking of themselves as having value to the whole of society, yet retaining their own individuality.  One teacher of character can turn out into society 30 people of character. One high school of character can turn loose as many as 1,000 almost-adults into a community. One family of character can turn loose into the world a Toby Tanser, Jason McElwain, Talia Leman, Craig Kielburger, John-Henry Lambin, Suzie Tipton, Melissa Poe or Sabriye Tenberken.

A person of character is:

• A good person, someone to look up to and admire.
• Knows the difference between right and wrong, and always tries to do what is right.
• Sets a good example for everyone.
• Makes the world a better place.
• Lives according to the Six Pillars of Character*:

-Trustworthiness
- Respect
- Responsibility
- Fairness
- Caring
- Citizenship

*Six Pillars of Character

Wisdom handed down is gold

Today I had the good fortune to visit a poetry blog of import, Experiments in Writing. A blog penned by Mysoul, an appropriate name for this writer. Mysoul, writer of poems, also blesses her readers with inner, rich spiritual thoughts that leave the reader longing for days past when people shared common principles. A life built upon goodness, respect for self and others, truth and harmony, to name just a few of the themes running through a piece entitled, To My Grandchildren. This, a loving testimony of a life governed by principles, where this solid foundation is laid out for her grandchildren to read and inspire to live by.

This piece by Mysoul is indicative of the type of philosophy we need so badly to teach our children from their youngest days until its message is felt inside as natural as breathing. We can lead our children to better times ahead with such a message as this.